Even thought the club is closed we still need your humour stuffl

Got any humour u think is better? got some internet junk? Good jpegs? movies?, Send it to us and we'll put it on here. Let us know your name (or handle) or remain anomymous

CLICK BELOW TO SEND IT TO US AND MAKE US ALL LAUGH
laughedinearlycrapped@rosiesnightlub.com

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Things you Don't See every day
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New Bird Flu Game (PowerPoint Presentation)
 

Videos    Powerpoint Pres   Tesco Scam Jokes

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Funny Videos 4 u

Mobile Phones Cause Accidents!!

For Sale - The New Rosies Super Cordless Drill!!

Men Drivers
Bad First Day at Work Ben
How not to use a Bazooka Reporter Woes
Steven Gerarrd Getting Shown up Premature celebration video

Knock out before the jump

Bud Lite Advert
When a Japanese Baby is Born She Should have Gone to Specsavers!
Teaching the Missus a Hand Job (2mb WMV) Can the Bin man charm the beauty? (4.8mb)

Jesus Christ the Musical -BRILLIANT (2.4mb)

Dropping Head Video (0.8mb)
This man is having a bad day! (5mb) The grossest Chimp u will ever see!! (.4mb)

Power Point Presentations

Click below to find our how Micheal Barry more did it!
The answer to the great big brother Riddle

Find out about Hurricane shazza hitting Great Yarmouth
The Greatest Lies in the World
Xmas Jokes
Other Jokes for you
 

Tesco Great Yarmouth Scam

I don't how many of you shop at Tesco but this may be useful to know.
I am posting this to you to warn you of something that happened to me, as I
have become a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.
This happened to me at Tesco in Yarmouth and it could happen to you. Here's
how the scam works:

Two seriously good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you
are packing your shopping in the boot. They both start wiping your
windscreen with a rag and Windolene, with their breasts almost falling out
of their skimpy t-shirts.

It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip,
they say 'No' and instead ask you for a lift down the road.
You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start having
sex with each other. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and
performs oral sex on you, while the other one steals your wallet.
I
had my wallet stolen last Tuesday, Wednesday, twice on Thursday, again on
Friday....................

 

Some Other Jokes for you

We know who those gay premership footballers are!!! For legal reasons we cannot tell you, however we can confirm they play for Sunderland. They are after all the experts in going down!!!!

Dawn French has been arrested for possession of hard drugs. She went through customs with no knickers on, fell over and exposed 40lbs of CRACK !!
A guy decides to have a party where his guests are asked to come
dressesd as different emotions e.g. fear, happiness etc. On the night of the party, the doorbell goes, and the host opens the door to see two Irish blokes, Paddy and Mick. They are standing stark naked one with his knob in a bowl of custard, and the other with his knob stuck in a pear.
The host is really shocked and says, "Well, what the heck are you doing? You could get arrested standing out there in the street like that- but anyway what emotion are you two supposed to be?!?!" Paddy replies, "Well, Oim foikn discustard, and Mick here has just come in despair!!!!"
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table.
A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet 20 thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she hollered, "Yes! Yes! I won! I won!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. She then picked up all the money and clothes
and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded.
Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I don't know, I thought you were watching

 

The other day I phoned my local pizza delivery firm and asked for a thin and crusty supreme.

They sent me Diana Ross.

A little girl goes to the barbershop with her father.
She stands next to the barber chair, eating a cake while her dad gets his haircut. The barber smiles at her and says, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your muffin." "I know," she replies. "I'm gonna get t*ts too."
 
A bloke is driving happily along in his car with his girlfriend when he's pulled over by the Police.
The police officer approaches him and asks: "Have you been drinking Sir?". "Why?" asks the man, "Was I driving badly?"
"No" replies the Officer, "You were driving splendidly. It was the ugly fat bird in the passenger seat that made me suspicious"
A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service the pallbearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive. She lived for ten more years, and then dies peacefully. A ceremony is again held at the same place, and at the end of the ceremony the pallbearers are again carrying out the casket.As they are walking, the husband cries out, "Watch the wall!"
The husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed, when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache".
Perfect," her husband said. "I was just in the bathroom powdering my d*ck with aspirin. You can take it orally or as a suppository, it's up to you!!!
A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?" The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie and ActionMan." Santa looks at the little girl for a moment and says, "I thought Barbie comes with Ken." "No," said the little girl. "She comes with Action Man, she fakes it with Ken."
Sky have just won the rights to screen the first World Origami
Championships from Tokyo. Unfortunately it's only available on Paper
View.
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The Greatest Lies in the World

  • The check's in the mail.
  • I'm from the government and I'm here to help you.
  • I thought I already gave you that money I owed you.
  • I promise I'll pay you back next Friday.
  • I've never been this drunk before.
  • I'll never get this drunk again.
  • I've checked this Email out, and it's really not a hoax.
  • Now we're even.
  • I'm fine.
  • We found and fixed the last bug!
  • The software will ship on schedule.
  • It was as simple as that.
  • It's all your fault!
  • I love you
  • You don't need to use a condom; I'm on the Pill.
  • I don't need to use a condom; I've had a vasectomy and tested negative for STDs.
  • A representative of the government says...
  • We'll have the repairs on your car done by noon.
  • Operator, my calling card number is...
  • You look like you haven't aged a day.
  • No, I don't think that outfit makes you look fat.
  • This is what it will cost to repair your car.
  • If elected, I promise...
  • You're going to love working here.
  • I don't know what you're talking about.
  • Nine out of ten people surveyed said...
  • Please hold, and a customer service representative will be with you shortly.
  • I'll only take a minute of your time.
  • Our cellular phones will give you more freedom...
  • 100% compatible with your existing equipment.
  • !!Make Money Fast!!
  • Lose all the weight you want!
  • I'm being totally unbiased.
  • I promise I'll pull out in time.
  • With all due respect...
  • For your convenience...
  • In order to serve you better...
  • I'm planning to get a divorce so I can marry you.
  • I'll call you.
  • I never meant to mislead you.
  • My wife (husband) is okay with me seeing other people; s/he just doesn't want to know about it.
  • I'm not leaving you for him/her; I just need some space to think things through.
  • This will only hurt a little.
  • This will hurt me more than it does you.
  • I'm doing this for your own good.
  • It's only for a little while...
  • I didn't mean any harm.
  • Oh well, no harm done...
  • It was an accident.
  • I didn't do it.
  • I don't know who did it.
  • We are experiencing a peak level of call volume...
  • Free Adult XXX Web Site!!!
  • No obligation!
  • You may already be a winner!
  • This product was made in an environmentally friendly manner.
  • I know it's none of my business...
  • I'm not trying to tell you what to do, but...
  • This should be easy.
  • To speak to a representative, press "9".
  • It's nothing personal.
  • This isn't partisan politics; it's for the good of the country.
  • I'm not addicted; I can quit smoking any time I want.
  • New and Improved!
  • Trust me.
  • That was special.
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HURRICANE SHAZZA HITS GREAT YARMOUTH

A major Hurricane (Shazza) measuring 5.8 on the Richter scale hit In the early hours of Monday. Epicentre: Great Yarmouth, Norfolk. Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering "faaackin ell" .. The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage.

Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearic and Spanish Costa's were damaged beyond repair. Three Areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros arrived.

The Beach FM (County Radio Station) reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered, still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Great Yarmouth.

One resident, Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was watching Trisha the next morning."

Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as normal. The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.

HOW CAN YOU HELP?
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include:  

  • Fila or Burberry baseball caps
  • Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
  • Shell suits (female)
  • White sport socks
  • Rockport boots
  • Any other items usually sold in Primark.
  • Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
  • Required foodstuffs include:
  • Microwave meals
  • Tins of baked beans
  • Ice cream
  • Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
  • 22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms
  • £2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9
  • £5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.
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XMAS JOKES

Things not to say when hanging the Xmas Lights
How to wrap the Presents (with a cat)
Signs your partner is cheating with Santa Claus
Rosies top Ten Reasons Why santa hates You
Toys u wont see at Toys 'R' Us
Signs your kids hate your presents
10 sure signs your sick of the Christmas Holidays
Christmas songs for cats & dogs
How to say Merry Christmas in Over 80 LAnguages
Songs for the Mentally Impaired

 

HOT OFF THE PRESS CHRISTMAS IS CANCELLED
They have found the Father!
EASTER IS ALSO CANCELED
They have found the Body!
When I was a kid our Christmases were very poor. We couldn't afford tinsel. We had to wait for grandad to sneeze What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus
Clausaphobic
What do the female reindeer do when Santa takes the male reindeer out on Christmas Eve ?
They go into town, and blow a few bucks.
 
Why are women's breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmas time ?
Because they  were originally  made for children but the father wants to play with them
Christmas is weird. What other time of the year do you sit in
front of a dead tree and eat Sweets out of your socks?
 
Overheard in Santa's Toyshop:  "Please, Mrs. Claus, those batteries
are for the children's toys!!"
Q. How come Santa and Mrs. Claus don't have children?
A. Santa spends all his time with elves and fairies.
 
Post your packages early so the post office can lose them in time
for Christmas.
The wife is shopping for Christmas gifts,
With purchases small and large.
She doesn't believe in Santa Claus,
She believes in Master Charge!
Someone has stated that the three phrases that best sum up the
Christmas season are "Peace on Earth", "Goodwill to Men" and
"Batteries not included."
 
When I was young, my family was so poor that for Christmas we got
batteries with a note attached saying "Toy not included."
At a cinema near you 20th of December
"Blazing Saddles 2 -- How the Stench Stole Christmas
Q. Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
A. You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
There is No L
How are a Christmas tree and a priest alike ?
They both have ornamental balls
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite
The three wise men arrived to visit the child lying in the manger.  One of the wise men was exceptionally tall, and bumped his head on the low doorway as he entered the stable.
"Jesus Christ!" he shouted.
Joseph said, "Write that down, Mary; it's better than Clyde
What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet
 

Things Not To Say When Hanging The Lights

Did you know that hanging lights on a Christmas tree is one of the three most stressful situations in an on-going relationship?

Psychiatrists claim the other two danger zones are teaching your mate to drive and wallpapering. They are rarely wrong on these things. Here at Rosies we rush you an emergency list of Things Not To Say When Hanging Lights on the Christmas Tree.

-- "You've got two red lights right next to each other, dummy. You're supposed to go yellow, green, red, blue, not yellow, red, red, green, blue..."
 -- "Up a little higher. You can reach it. Go on, try."
 -- "What the hell do you do to these lights when you put them away every year? Tie them in knot?"
-- "Come away from that aluminum ladder, kids. I'm going to fry that sucker."
-- "If you're not going to do it right, don't do it at all. Don't just throw them on, like you do the icicles. You're worse than your father."
-- "Give me that!"
-- "You've got the whole thing on the tree upside-down. The electric pluggee thing should be down here at the bottom, not up at the top."
-- "I don't care if you have found another two strings, I'm done!"
-- "You've just wound 'em around and around - I thought we agreed it shouldn't look like a spiral this year?"
 -- "Have you been drinking?"
-- "Where's the cat?"

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Toys You Won't See (at Toys R Us) This Christmas 

~ Drill 'Em 'N Fill 'Em" Home Dentistry Kit 
~ Boobs in a Bottle" Breast Enlargement Formula 
~ "Jump-Start" Home Defibrilator Save someone from a heart attack
  without the hassle of rushing them to a hospital! 
~ George Micheal "tours of American Parks"
~ "Golden Shower" Beer The only alcoholic beverage made from 100%
  recycled beer. 
~ Micheal Jackson's Good parent guide
~ "Time Life Books Presents Home Surgery" 
~ 'Stripper Fun' Barbie
~ "No Thanks" Trapdoor for Solicitors Installed with iron spikes,
~ "Balz-Off" Testosterone Repressor 
~ Keychain Belly Rings Hang your keys on your belly button! 
~ 'Gynecologist' Ken Comes with 'Sexy Patient' Barbie
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Christmas Songs for Dogs Christmas Songs for Cats
 1.  Grandma Got Run Over by a Rottweiler

 2.  We Three Canines

 3.  Oh, Holy Fire Hydrant

 4.  Duke, the Red Nosed Doberman

 5.  Sniffing Around the Christmas Tree

 6.  Jingle Bones

 7.  Wreck the Halls!

 8.  I Saw Mommy Licking Santa Claus

 9.  Away in a Dog House

10.  All I Want For Xmas is My Own Chew Toy
 1.  Claw the Halls

 2.  Away in a Litter Box

 3.  Jingle Purrs 

 4.  Joy, To the Catnip

 5.  The First Meow

 6.  Feline Navidad

 7.  I Saw Mommy Hiss at Santa Claus

 8.  Frosty, the Furball

 9.  Here Comes Santa Claws

10.  Oh, Come All Ye Fishful

11.  Oh! Scratching Post
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Signs Your Partner Is Cheating With Santa


Instead of cookies and milk, she leaves out a fifth of Scotch and edible panties.
Comes home with tinsel stuck between her teeth and Claus marks on her back.
Of the 200 presents for her under the tree, you bought three of them.
Never very adventuresome in bed, she suddenly asks if you want to do it "reindeer style."
He comes in late, brushes his teeth furiously, uses floss and mouthwash for the first time in years, then says, "Well, it looks 
like I'm finally getting that train set this year!"
Her picture is prominently featured on santasbitches.com. 
Every day after work, elves block you in traffic to keep you from getting home too early.
She's shaved her pubic hair into the shape of a little chimney.
Tells you that you would look a lot sexier if you grew a beard and added 4 stone.
Every December 24th it's the same routine: She puts on a teddy and sits on the roof.
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Wrapping Presents (With a Cat)

  1. Clear large space on table for wrapping present.
  2. Go to wardrobe and collect bag in which present is contained, and close  door.
  3. Open door and remove cat from wardrobe.
  4. Go to cupboard and retrieve rolls of wrapping paper.
  5. Go back and remove cat from cupboard.
  6. Go to drawer and collect transparent sticky tape, ribbons, scissors, labels, etc.
  7. Lay out present and wrapping materials on table, to enable wrapping strategy to be formed.
  8. Go back to drawer to get string, remove cat that has been in the drawer  since last visit, and collect string.
  9. Remove present from bag.
10. Remove cat from bag.
11. Open box to check present, remove cat from box, replace present.
12. Lay out paper to enable cutting to size.
13. Cut the paper to size, trying to keep the cutting line straight.
14. Throw away first sheet because cat tried to chase the scissors and tore the paper.
15. Cut second sheet of paper to size by putting cat in the bag the present came out of.
16. Place present on cut-to-size paper.
17. Lift up edges of paper to seal in present, wonder why edges now don't reach,
    and find cat between present and paper. Remove cat and retry.
18. Place object on paper, to hold in place, while cutting transparent sticky tape.
19. Spend next 20 minutes carefully trying to remove transparent sticky tape 
    from cat with pair of nail scissors.
20. Seal paper down with transparent sticky tape, making corners as neat as  possible.
21. Look for roll of ribbon; chase cat down hall and retrieve ribbon.
22. Try to wrap present with ribbon in a two-directional turn.
23. Re-roll up ribbon and remove paper that is now torn, due to cat's 
    enthusiasm in chasing ribbon end.
24. Repeat steps 12-22 until down to last sheet of paper.
25. Decide to skip steps 12-16 in order to save time and reduce risk of losing 
    last sheet of paper. Retrieve old cardboard box that you know is right  size for sheet of paper.
26. Put present in box, and tie down with string.
27. Remove string, open box and remove cat.
28. Put all packing materials in bag with present and head for lockable room.
29. Once inside room, lock door and start to re-lay out packing materials.
30. Remove cat from box, unlock door, put cat outside door, close door and re-lock.
31. Lay out last sheet of paper. (Admittedly this is difficult in the small area
    of the toilet, but try your best!)
32. Seal box, wrap with paper and start repairs by very carefully sealing down
    tears with transparent sticky tape. Now tie up with ribbon and decorate 
    with bows to hide worst affected areas.
33. Label, then sit back and admire your handiwork, congratulating yourself on 
    making good of a bad job.
34. Unlock door, and go to kitchen to make drink and feed cat.
35. Spend next 15 minutes looking for cat, before coming to obvious conclusion.
36. Unwrap present, untie box and remove cat.
37. Retrieve all discarded sheets of wrapping paper, feed cat and retire to 
    lockable room for last attempt, making certain you are alone and the door is locked.
38. At time of handing over present, smile sweetly at receiver's face, as they 
    try and hide their contempt at being handed such a badly wrapped present.
39. Swear to yourself that next year, you will get the store to wrap the darn 
    thing for you.
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Rosies top ten reasons why Santa Hates You
10. He eats milk and cookies -- and Humps your Girlfriend
 9. Every naughty thing you did this year was videotaped and 
    posted on the Internet
 8. On Christmas morning, your stocking stuffed with a severed leg
 7. Only "gift" you received was left by Blitzen on your living 
    room carpet
 6. Your stocking is ticking.
 5. Sends Simon Cowell into your local just as your about to sing on Karoake
 4. You get no presents -- when you bump into him later, he gives
    you lame, "I thought you were a chav" excuse
 3. Brings you one copy of every Take That CD
 2. Turns Trigger and Mop loose on you
 1. Writes "Happy Holidays" in the snow on the roof
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10 Signs You're Sick of the Christmas


10. You've got red and green bags under your eyes.
 9. You're serving reindeer pot pie.
 8. When you hear, "Sleigh bells ring, are you listenin'?,"  you
    scream, "NO, SCUMBAG! I'M NOT LISTENING!!!"
 7. You climb on your roof and start gobbing on Christmas carolers.
 6. You think you hear your Christmas tree taunting you.
 5. Instead of spending time with family, the repeats of the Sound of Music.
 4. You're Arrested for running through town wearing nothing but
    mistletoe.
 3. You've got eggnog coming out of your ears.
 2. Your standard response, "And happy Christmas to you too, you
   Chav lover!"
 1. Two words tinsel rash.
Signs Your Kids Don't Like Their Christmas Presents


10. There's something half-hearted about the way they say, "Oh
     wow -- Q-  Tips".
 9. They spend Christmas morning making up games involving
    Matalan carrier Bags
 8. They hire a hit man to break Santa's kneecaps.
 7. You see them trying to shove everything back up the chimney.
 6. Spelled out in Legos on the front lawn are the words "You're
    Cheap!!!".
 5. Moments after they unwrap gifts, you see them for sale on
    E-Bay.
 4. Your son simply refuses to understand why you couldn't get him
    two hours alone with Kelly Clarkson.
 3. They cite your gifts as a major factor in their decision to 
    convert to Islam.
 2. You wake up and find the head of Barney in your bed.
 1. They ask, "Where'd you buy this stuff -- Crap `R' Us?"
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Merry Christmas Y'All ! (How to say Merry Christmas on over 80 Languages


Afrikaans - 'n Geseende Kersfees en 'n voorspoedige Nuwejaar
Afrikander - Een Plesierige Kerfees
Albanian -- Gezuar Krishtlindje
American - Merry Christmas
Arabic - I'D MIILAD SAID OUA SANA SAIDA
Armenian - Shenoraavor Nor Dari yev Pari Gaghand
Azeri - Tezze Iliniz Yahsi Olsun
Basque - Zorionstsu Eguberri. Zoriontsu Urte Berri On
Bengali - Bodo Din Shubh Lamona
Bohemian - Vesele Vanoce
Breton - Nedeleg laouen na bloavezh mat
Bulgarian - Tchestita Koleda; Tchestito Rojdestvo Hristovo
Celtic - Nadolig Llawen a Blwyddyn Newydd Dda
Chinese -
(Mandarin) Kung His Hsin Nien bing Chu Shen Tan
(Catonese) Gun Tso Sun Tan'Gung Haw Sun
(Hong Kong) Kung Ho Hsin Hsi.  Ching Chi Shen Tan
Cornish - Nadelik looan na looan blethen noweth
Cree - Mitho Makosi Kesikansi
Croatian - Sretan Bozic
Czech - Prejeme Vam Vesele Vanoce a stastny Novy Rok
Danish - Gladelig Jul
Dutch - Vrolijk Kerstfeest en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar!
English - Merry Christmas
Esperanto - Gajan Kristnaskon
Estonian - Roomsaid Joulu Puhi
Farsi - Cristmas-e-shoma mobarak bashad
Finnish - Hyvaa joulua
French - Joyeux Noel
Frisian - Noflike Krystdagen en in protte Lok en Seine yn it Nije Jier!
German - Froehliche Weihnachten
Greek - Kala Christouyenna!
Hawaiian - Mele Kalikimaka
Hebrew - Mo'adim Lesimkha. Chena tova
Hindi - Bada Din Mubarak Ho
Hungarian - Kellemes Karacsonyi unnepeket
Icelandic - Gledileg Jol
Indonesian - Selamat Hari Natal
Iraqi - Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah
Irish - Nollaig Shona Dhuit
Italian - Buone Feste Natalizie
Japanese - Shinnen omedeto. Kurisumasu Omedeto
Kala- Khristougena kai Eftikhes to Neon Etos
Korean - Sung Tan Chuk Ha
Latvian - Priecigus Ziemas Svetkus un Laimigu Jauno Gadu
Lettish - Priecigus Ziemassvetkus
Lithuanian - Linksmu Kaledu
Manx - Nollick ghennal as blein vie noa
Maori - Meri Kirihimete
Marathi - Shub Naya Varsh
Navajo - Merry Keshmish
Northern Sotho  Matlhatse le matlhogonolo mo ngwageng o moswa.
Norwegian - God Jul Og Godt Nytt Aar
Pennsylvania German - En frehlicher Grischtdaag un en hallich Nei Yaahr!
Papiamento  Bon Pasku i Felis Anja Nobo
Pig Latin        Errymay  ristmaskay nday appyhay ewnay earyay
Polish - Wesolych Swiat Bozego Narodzenia
Portuguese - Feliz Natal
Rapa-Nui - Mata-Ki-Te-Rangi. Te-Pito-O-Te-Henua
Romanian - Craciun Fericit
Russian - Pozdrevlyayu s prazdnikom Rozhdestva is Novim Godom
Serbian - Hristos se rodi
Slovakian - Sretan Bozic or Vesele vianoce
Samoan - La Maunia Le Kilisimasi Ma Le Tausaga Fou
Scottish - Nollaig Chridheil agus Bliadhna Mhath Ur
Serbian - Hristos se rodi!
Singhalese - Subha nath thalak Vewa. Subha Aluth Awrudhak Vewa
Slovak - Vesele Vianoce. A stastlivy Novy Rok
Slovene - Vesele Bozicne. Screcno Novo Leto
Spanish - Feliz Navidad!
Swedish - God Jul and (Och) Ett Gott Nytt Ar
Tagalog - Maligayamg Pasko. Masaganang Bagong Taon
Tamil - Nathar Puthu Varuda Valthukkal
Thai - Sawadee Pee Mai
Turkish - Noeliniz Ve Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun
Ukrainian - Srozhdestvom Kristovym
Urdu - Naya Saal Mubarak Ho
Vietnamese - Chung Mung Giang Sinh
Waray Maupay nga Pasko ngan Mainuswagon nga Bag-o nga Tu-ig
Welsh - Nadolig Llawen
Zulu -Nginifisela inhlanhla ne mpumelelo e nyakeni
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Christmas Songs For The Mentally Disturbed


SCHIZOPHRENIA
Do you Hear What I Hear?
PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY
On the First Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me (and then took it
all away).

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER (as suffered by Premiership Footballers)
Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire.

PARANOID
Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me.

PERSONALITY DISORDER
You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell you
Why.

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY DISORDER
We Three Queens Disoriented Are

DEMENTIA
I Think I'll Be Home for Christmas

NARCISSISTIC
Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

MANIC
Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and
Office and Town and Cars and Busses and Trucks and Trees and Fire
Hydrants and.....

DEPRESSION
Silent Anhedonia, Holy Anhedonia, All is Flat, All is Lonely.

OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
        Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock ........
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock,
...(better start again)

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